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Practical Tips Need to Follow Accommodation Demands

Posted: 8/29/2008 at 01:18 AM

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I am sitting here, writing another two-part article for Uptake.com. This article is entitled Traveling with Autistic Children: Tips for Fellow Travelers and Parents. Given recent events in the news, most notably a mother and young son being deplaned because of his autistic behavior, my contact eagerly accepted the article idea when I pitched it to her.

I had no problem finding tips for parents on how to ease the experience for their autistic child. I could write several times the required 500 words.

However, the challenge is proving to be finding tips for the fellow traveler. After spending several quality hours with Google, I have yet to find any practical tips for the traveler who finds himself seated beside a child with autism on a flight or at the next table in a restaurant. Be patient, be understanding and be empathic does not tell me, a fellow traveler, how to handle a difficult situation.

I appreciate the need to accommodate individuals with autism, but I need to know how. I agree people with autism have the right to travel and to be in public places, but tell me how to best interact with them.

Tell me:

  • what to do when I am seated beside an autistic child who is constantly repeating a sound or a gesture;
  • what to do when the child behind me is kicking my seat non-stop;
  • what to do when an autistic child has a temper tantrum - do I offer to help or do I look away?;
  • what to do when I see a beleaguered parent struggling to control her child amidst a sea of glaring and judgmental eyes;
  • do I talk to the child to distract him;
  • do I reach out to him or would that exacerbate the situation;
  • how do I offer to help without offending the parent;
  • how do I know the difference between an autistic child and a bratty one.

I have been to countless websites on autism looking for practical tips, including the Autism Society of America site where clicking on the "I Want to Help" button takes me to a donation page. I'm not interested in donating, I would like information on how to be understanding and empathic in a situation in which I do not know what to do.

Please, when demanding that your disability be accommodated, tell me, your fellow traveler, how I may assist you.

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  • darrenhillock wrote on Aug 29, 2008 at 8:04 AM
    For what it's worth, I think a lot of your specific questions are answered by the admittedly vague concepts of patience, understanding and empathy. My son is not autistic, but is severely developmentally disabled and can have some behavior in public that others find disruptive, especially if he is having a really bad -- or really good -- day. What I most want from others is some open-mindedness that maybe I know how to handle the situation, that I am not so dumb as to not be trying to address that situation and that likely, through my experience, I have a better idea of how to proceed than them. Patience, empathy and understanding. Maybe some support if it can be offered in a sincere way. If someone with a sufficiently open mind reads your article you'll help them develop the understanding. Hopefully that leads to the empathy and ultimately the patience.
  • Nanal wrote on Aug 29, 2008 at 8:37 PM
    It's a great question...........I also would like some real tips as to how to help.........I hope many more of you who know how to deal with this will offer more concrete tips..........thanks for asking the question..............peace and love .......Norma
  • Merle wrote on Aug 29, 2008 at 10:38 PM
    I belong to an Asperger's Syndrome/Autism online forum and I will post your questions in the Parents section as well in general Autism discussion. If I get any answers, I will put it in the comments.