Disaboom whiskeyman1130 - All Comments

Re: STOP THIS RIDE..... I WANT TO GET OFF!!!

Emma6 — Fri, 11 Jul 2008 17:33:52 GMT

I generally like to get an honest response to a question. But, sometimes I get carried away. For an example, last night I visited a website. A commentator to a blog suggested going to the AARP to get financial help. I did that and, of course, the website had a questionaire to fill out. I spent a quite awhile filling that out. The AARP spit out a canned (and an expected) response: "No help for you, but there are more forms you can fill out". I exploded in tears and filled two pages of angry to no one in particular. I don't think it made sense. But I was up all night trying to look up statistics and crying and trying to frame up my thoughts. And then I hit the submit button and regretted everything I wrote. I mean, does the computer care? I suppose someone might try to read my rantings some day, but will they find some help? Probably not. However, to whiskeyman1130, I think it is hard to be honest. But it is even harder to smile and say "everything is okay", when it isn't. When my daughter was little I would always quote Dr. Suess "Those that mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." A couple of other reactions to your blog: 1) I am glad that your therapist makes you feel better. This is hard to find, I believe that it is a good thing. And if she validates and supports your feelings - priceless. 2) You need to take care of yourself as best as you can. 3) Maybe your sister is just a bit like me. I just can't look at the problem square at it's eye, until it cannot be ignored and then I explode in tears and accusations that don't make a bit of sense. You probably know her better than anyone, so this is just a suggestion from a stranger. Maybe, you can try to talk to her again, with a little warning. Like maybe say to her "I didn't understand what you were trying to tell me the other day. Maybe after you get back from shopping we can talk about it again." And if she still can't handle doing what she has been doing, maybe you can discuss getting someone in to help for a couple of hours a day, or then go ahead with your plan to find funding to move. I am not patronize you, I have a sister who I haven't talked to for many years because she thought she "was the boss of the world". I tried to appease her until she decided to harm the people I loved in order to harm me. She won. I left. I'm just throwing out some ideas and unwinding the rant in me.

re: Why Can't The Disabled Be Homeless?

bonniethesurvivor — Sun, 04 May 2008 22:34:01 GMT

This Kafka situation is not unusual, and is so totally ridiculous! I am sorry you experienced these humiliations, and that somehow things work out well for you in the future.

At one time, I had a ministry in Liberty City in Miami for disabled homeless individuals, funded by the Episcopal Diocese. We were able to help many people who were actually living out of doors because they refused to live in nursing homes. Unfortunately, a new Bishop was appointed, and he transferred funds to South America, defunding the ministries that were local, and particularly those for disability.

We had previously found low cost apartments and matched room mates, helped people find employment or work to make SS and SSI pay for their needs, and qualify if they were not receiving SS etc.

Unfortunately, due to the cultural issues of the city, this ministry was not deemed to be as important as helping those in Latin America. We had also worked with the local CILO, but the ministry no longer exists.

I wish more church based groups would see their outreach as something that could go beyond food kitchens one day a week, etc., and address fundamental life issues of some of the neediest people in our country.

re: THIS SUCKS!

fwduplain — Sat, 19 Apr 2008 14:07:32 GMT

Whiskeyman your are diffenatly hitting hard times. I won't begin to imagine what its like. I am not a quadraplegic but I did have colon cancer and ended up with a colostomy bag. You more then anyone knows the power of taking 1 day at a time, 1 hour at a time and getting through the next few minutes. The pain and discomfort of feeling every bit of food going through your system with subside. Having to go to a nursing home may not be all that bad. Just look at it as temporary. You can find contacts who are dealing with similair siutations. Check with the veterans hospital, thay may be able to get you in touch with the right groups to help. Just plan on the nursing home as research time. As far as your family, Try to find someone who can put your heartfelt feelings down on paper for you sister. Try to understand that power of attorney or even custody, if its shared, my not be a bad thing. Even though thinking ahead of 1/2 a day may be as far as you can, you need to think of what could happen farther down the road. When I was at my lowest and didn't understand why all the stit was happening, I remembered long ago when I saw small children haveing to battle with like problems. I remember praying to God that if any horrible thing was to happen to my children to please give the burden to me and let me carry and deal with it. I look at my life now and those prayers being answered. Just remember your not the first that has had to go through hell and you won't be the last. There are others who are worst off then you. And you will get through this, its just a process of learning and adjusting. You will get through it.

re: STOP THIS RIDE..... I WANT TO GET OFF!!!

Bluesgal1127 — Sat, 05 Apr 2008 03:17:47 GMT

I ask somtimes... you want my going out answer or the one when I am home alone....

You hang in there!

re: STOP THIS RIDE..... I WANT TO GET OFF!!!

Daniel502 — Wed, 02 Apr 2008 18:32:02 GMT

I'm sure your friends would be blown away if they knew all of that. Truth is, they want the simple answer, no matter how complicated our lives are at the time.

re: HARD TIMES

Debbie — Sun, 23 Dec 2007 12:54:01 GMT

hello it's nice t meet you. i am also a sci. i have a suggestion for you. someone just recently said they wanted to open a place for people with sci. maybe you could find a place like that and rent a room so you could still make your own desicions but have people around to check in on you and help you and you could save time for family just to visit and if they act up make a b-line for the door lol. i hope you find an answer and welcome to disaboom :) xoxo