Living with a disability brings extra challenges to daily living. Someone recently commented to me, “Imagine the daily choices I make, knowing that on some days it takes upwards of three hours just to get up and out of the door in the morning?”
He is not unique; he’s paralysed at cervical level and he’s finding the vital resilience to live a fun and full life.
So when we have a disability, what are the extra factors that help us stay motivated? What gets us out of bed and gives us the strength and resilience to make the most of each day? I recently interviewed a number of people with disabilities, seeking to discover what it is that gives us the inner drive, the motivation to get up and get on.
Here are some of the motivating factors that came out of the interviews:
A desire to make the most of circumstancesHaving or acquiring a disability often gives you a higher appreciation of what you can do, and the function you do have. This can act as a motivator to want to make the most of life and use whatever parts of your body you can!
One interviewee had experienced a serious accident in the mountains that led to the loss of both his arms and legs due to frostbite. He commented, “Having come to the edge of the abyss and had this second chance, you do suddenly appreciate much more the opportunities that we have in life, and you do want to grasp the nettle a lot more.”
To improve self-esteemBecoming disabled can—certainly at first—damage your self-esteem. The desire to feel good about themselves drives some disabled people to want to make more of their life than before and to avoid being sucked into a low self-esteem abyss. A number of interviewees commented that they do what they can to avoid feeling diminished by their disability.
“Close to my heart, I wonder if I continue to compete (wheelchair racing) and achieve as a way to ‘hide’ my disability and prove to myself that on an emotional and spiritual level, I’m not really DISabled, I’m SUPERabled.”
“It’s not enough to be average. Because then I would have been worse than I was before the accident somehow. And I want to be better.”
Because there is no choiceMany things we do in life can feel like a challenge, but at the end of the day, what choice do we have? We can choose to feel sorry for ourselves, think that we have it hard, worse than others, and generally throw ourselves a pity party. Most of the people interviewed agreed there had been difficult times, but if we sustain an attitude of self-pity by feeding those feelings with too much negativity, life would be pretty miserable.
A professional wheelchair racer commented, “Everything can seem a challenge. But you just get on with it. What choice do you have? You just do it. And once you’ve done it a few times, you just do it again, and again, until it becomes easy.”
Positive attitudeHaving a positive attitude and the support of friends and family or social networks all came out as key elements in maintaining motivation. If we do what we can to enjoy life and feel good about ourselves, then motivation should begin to flow naturally.
February 21, 2008 grannysvision said:
my son is now 52 years of age and on 28th dec, 2007 he had a spinal a stroke that has now been named a spinal cord infraction stroke and will probably be paralyzed fron under is arm pits down. he was always very active and had no obvious sign of being sick before with any illness. he was building him own home and got as high as the fourth floor and then this stroke happened. now he is getting extremely depressed and is referring himself as "just a vegetable". we have contacted everyone & place that could be of assistance to him and things are "in the works" but still he is not sure. he does not necessarily want to be in a nursing home gor the rest of his life but it that is the only resolution, then he prays is will be some location such as seneca, s.c. or newar us, here in auburn, ga. all of his friends live in seneca, s.c. and his family lives in auburn, ga. the financial support will be the deciding factor and even that is somewhat slower than we need it to be. the biggest problems as to why he is still in the hospital in greenville, s.c. is the lack and guarantee of financial means. he needs someone or some organization to help him get both monetary support and mmeans of physical support. he is very moody. one second he is jovial then the next time he is irrated and angry. everyone tries to prepare him for these mood changes, and the nurses & doctors are doing what they can to help him but he wants to get on with his life and wonders why all this has happened to him. if there were someway that he could have his own residence with complete assistance 24/7 i think that it will be his surving methods but right now everything looks so bleak.
March 13, 2008 audreyt said:
Have you heard of Shepard Spinal Center in Atlanta, Georgia.
It is a wonderful place for people with spinal cord injuries.
May 3, 2008 rollerboy123 said:
As a guy paralyzed t-9 complete five years I stay motivated by just thinking about what I can do and not dwelling on my disability. I was injured in a free style skiing accident. Less than a year post injury I returned to skiing with a monoski. Also I like my hand cycle.
I really enjoy my teaching career too. Reaching out to the children I teach helps them understand disabilities and life in a chair. The kids seem to be more accepting than some of the parents.
Life goes on well. Now I want to meet a life partner. I know he is out there I just have to be proactive in while enjoying life.
Rollingguy
