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carmitch:

I hear ya, too.  Your 'drunk woman in the club' reminds me of someone I know.

At the club I go to, there's a guy w/ CP who's always there.  He gets to and from there by paratransit. And, each time he's there, he gets himself drunk.  (Why the club serves him alcohol at that point is beyond me.)  He's so drunk, he passes out in his power chair, head on the table.  By this point, people start asking ME to wake him up so he won't miss his ride.  Why should I, when I didn't come with him, nor got him drunk?  Their response is, "Well, he's your friend."  They assume he's my friend cause we're both in chairs.  Disabled or not, I don't hang out with drunks.  It's gotten to a point where I leave if I see him there.  I'm a fellow club patron, not his 'babysitter'.

Carlos, just tell the you don't know him.  He's never at the gimp meetings. 

 

Actaully, I'd mention to the management.  They might ban him from the place.

 Lol.

Well, the club has been busted for serving to drunk patrons already.  The guy's time there is coming to an end.  He's played the 'disability card' to be inappropriate with some there.  (I'm keeping it vague to be clean on here.)  None of the regular club's patrons like him anymore.  Sadly, the guy blames it on anti-disabled attitudes, when, in fact, it's his fault.

carmitch:

There's something I've noticed amongst disabled that I don't get.

I've had other disabled people come up to me, we talk, and assume we're friends.  I try to find something in common with them and I don't.  They act like, "Well, we're both disabled.  We're friends."  And, when we don't 'click', they get pissed and say that we should be friends cause we're disabled.

Not all asians get along with each other.  Not all gay people get along with each other.  Not all people of a certain economic level get along with each other.  Why do some disabled assume we all get along?

Me, I don't base my friendships on disabilty.  If you're disabled, cool.  If not disabled, cool also.

 

 

 

There's a difference between acquaintances - people we may see at work, school, stores, etc., who have something in common with us, and friends. To have the occasional conversation, 'hello, how's it going today?' with acquaintances is one thing, but I want to have more in common with those people who are my friends than just one or two things. That we both like the same genre of movies, or we're both into this or that, or that we're both disabled probably just isn't going to be enough to build and sustain a friendship on. But I'd love to say 'hello' when we pass each other in that common public area.

 

Nightengale wrote:

I think this website - in fact this very thread - serve as perfect examples of how little people with disabilities can have in common sometimes.

 

I don't think PWD should be instant friends just as people of other minority groups do not need to be instant friends.  But I do wish  we banded together more for the common causes of accessibility, accommodations and awareness.  One step towards that might be acknowleding each other more in public - something that PWD are often reluctant to do just as non-disabled are often reluctant to mention our disabilities.  But I don't think we have any obligation to do this, just wish we did more often.

 

Sites such as Disaboom can be great in both of these areas (as well as many others, of course). Not only can they help in bringing us together in the common causes you've mentioned Nightengale, but sometimes people connecting on sites such as these also find out they actually do have more in common than just their disabilities, and our common causes. Sometimes we actually do make friends. :-)

 

 

I think people just like the feeling of belonging to a group.  Before I was injured I rode motorcycles, It seemed everywhere I went I had someone wanting to talk to me about their bike they have or use to have.  Even on the road there is a unwritten code to wave at other riders when passing.  It is the same way with disabled but the only difference is I do not know anyone who choose this like I choose to ride motorcycles.  Some people see that and some do not.

TriDog:

 

I don't acknowledge any gimp I don't see at the secret meetings... 

 

You guys do go to the meetings?   Right?   

 

 

Waaaaaaaaaaaait, wait, wait... y'all have meetings? Is it because I can walk? is that why I am excluded?! Are there cookies? Do you have cookies, too??

BrokenDoNotUse:

Sites such as Disaboom can be great in both of these areas (as well as many others, of course). Not only can they help in bringing us together in the common causes you've mentioned Nightengale, but sometimes people connecting on sites such as these also find out they actually do have more in common than just their disabilities, and our common causes. Sometimes we actually do make friends. :-)

 

 

They invite you to the meetings, don't they?? I knew it! 

ArkanzanWheeler:

It is the same way with disabled but the only difference is I do not know anyone who choose this like I choose to ride motorcycles.  Some people see that and some do not.

 

 

Duuuuuuuuuuude,... I was searching for a type of sexual paraphilia today and ran across this: Apotemnophilia - This person is sexually aroused by having a part of their body amputated either by themselves or someone else. The memory of the amputation can serve to arouse them for years. It is the act of having an extremity amputated that is arousing; thus, they have to be awake during the process.

Eeeeeek! 

Liesl, you post about sexual paraphilia and you think of me?!?  WTF...lol.  Of all the things to be aroused by that did not even get close to being on the list...lol.  I hope the people who have this condition have a good memory, hate to have to keep doing this... after while you are going to run out of things to cut off.