Last post Wed, May 14 2008 6:32 AM by bonniethesurvivor. 2 replies.
Hi Brittany
It may not be what you want to hear sweetheart but I think maybe you should concentrate on learning to be happy with just yourself and then that man will come to you...I promise. It's always when we have almost 'given up' and we are not 'needy' that the right one comes our way.
I do understand, I caught my first ex-husband with my best friend, and then 3 months later with my sister!!
It hurts like hell, you blame yourself. Your ex is not worthy of you. All these things are so that you can let go of what doesn't serve you any more and have what you deserve baby! It is not your fault.
Keep smiling honey, your time will come and when you are happiest with yourself!!
Dawn
Dear Brittany,
Like Dawn, I have a POV that may not be exactly what you want to hear, but may be helpful to you in the long run. In my experience, of 25 years of marriage, partners, whether they are disabled or not, need to "lean on each other," while each stands alone with the strength of his or herself. Looking for someone to lean on is a way to avoid finding the ability to be your own person.
In order to have a successful relationship, in my experience and in watching marriages and relationships fail or succeed, those who make it are those who are their own person first, and then find another with whom they can meld and build a new union. Right now, you are speaking and feeling from the pain of that awful infidelity and betrayal, but looking for support from another is probably not the right way to find real happiness.
It is my hope that you build confidence and security with the person you are, and joy in your relationship with your son. At that point, it seems to me, you will be ready to enter into a lasting relationship with another person while retaining the individuality that you have worked to develop.
My very best wishes to you, and warmest regards. Bonnie
