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Posted on: Tue, Feb 5 2008 7:06 PM

Posted by: Tim Posts: 254

I read recently a post by an individual who been treated abusively in a chat room.  I've been wondering how Disaboom can address this.  Generally I am against any restrictions to speech.  I do not however believe people should be able to abuse others in a public forum.

I don't know if this has been addressed yet.  I know that in the case noted above the abusive individual logged out of the chat and came back as a "guest".  Individuals could be better held responsible if required to become members, supplying some personal information, at least an email address before accessing chat rooms.

I have been very grateful for the open nature of discussion here.  I dont want that to change.  Perhaps a lot can be done to keep people civil by making people identify themselves. 

Posted on: Tue, Feb 5 2008 7:30 PM

Posted by: Daisies1 Posts: 0

 You actually put abusive behavior in with freedom of speech???

Posted on: Tue, Feb 5 2008 7:33 PM

Posted by: shellGVchick Posts: 1,261

I WISH SOMETHING COULD BE DONE ABOUT THE CONSTANT GAY BASHING AND THINGS I HAVE HAD TO WITNESS THE LAST SEVERAL DAYS.  I THINK THERE ARE PEOPLE IN HERE WHO ARE GENERAL GOOD AND THE MAJORITY TREAT OTHERS AS THEY WANT TO BE TREATED BUT IT MAKES ME SICK TO SEE THE STUFF HAPPENING.  PEOPLE DON'T REALISE THAT MAYBE WHEN THEY ARE GAY BASHING, OR RACE BASHING THAT SOMEONE COULD BE SITTING THERE AT THEIR KEYBOARD REALLY GETTING HURT OR BEING OFFENDED BY WHATS TAKING PLACE.  YET THEY'D NEVER SPEAK UP BECAUSE THEY'D GET LABELED.  THIS MORNING I FINALLY LEFT THE ROOM BECAUSE A FEW STARTED TALKING ABOUT THIS PERSON AND THAT PERSON AND ABOUT AIDS AND BEING GAY AND HOW SOME SORT OF PEOPLE SHOULD BE JUST BLOWN OFF THE EARTH.

ARE WE PERFECT?  ARE WE GOD? NO WE'RE NOT SO WHY ARE WE SO CRITICAL OF ANYTHING DIFFERENT THEN WE ARE? WHY CAN'T YOU JUST KEEP YOUR COMMENTS TO YOURSELF AND THINK BEFORE YOU TYPE.  WHAT IF SOMEONE CAME IN AND STARTED BASHING YOU AND USING YOUR NAME AND DIDN'T STOP, HOW WOULD YOU FEEL.  WE ALL HAVE A VARIETY OF DISABILITES AND ILLNESSES IN HERE AND I THOUGHT THIS WOULD BE ONE PLACE WHERE I WASN'T JUDGED, LABELED, BELITTLED, LOOKED DOWN ON SO OTHER'S COULD BOOST THEIR EGO'S TO SATISFY THEMSELVES.  IT'S NO LONGER SAFE TO ME AND I WISH THERE WAS A MODERATOR WHO WAS WATCHING EACH ROOM AND NOT JUST HIDING IN IDLE. 

THE OTHER NIGHT I HAD THREE MEN CHOOSE FOR NO REASON TO BE SEXUAL PIGS AND SHOW SUCH LOW RESPECT AND MISCONDUCT AND THEY ALL THOUGHT THEY WERE BIG POWERFULL BAD BUTTS AND COULD JUST DO IT AS LONG AS THEY WANTED AND DIDN'T CARE.  JUST BECAUSE SOME OF US MAY GIVE THE SMOOCH SMILEY OR THE HEART SMILEY TO SOME, OR CALL SOMEONE HON, OR BABE, ETC JUST TERMS OF AFFECTION DOESN'T MEAN OTHER'S HAVE A RIGHT TO SEE THAT AND START BEING SEXUAL DEGRADING AND HAVE NO CONSEQUENCES AS ALL.

MAYBE IM TOO OUTSPOKEN, MAYBE I JUST AM REALLY CONFIDENT OF HOW I'D LIKE TO BE TREATED ON OR OFF A COMPUTER, BUT NOTHING SEEMS TO BE DONE, AND NO ONE WANTS TO STICK UP FOR EACHOTHER FOR FEAR OF ALSO BEING ATTACKED.

GAY IS GAY, STRAIGHT IS STRAIGHT, COLOR IS COLOR, IN THE END WE'RE ALL GOD'S CHILDREN WHO ARE LOVED AND ACCEPTED FOR WHAT WE ARE.  SOME BEING DISABLED DOESN'T GIVE THEM A RIGHT TO HURT OTHERS WHO ARE DISABLED.  I HAVE GAY FRIENDS AND YOU KNOW IT DOESN'T EVEN CROSS MY MIND BECAUSE I'M NOT WITH THEM TO MAKE A STATEMENT ABOUT HAVING GAY FRIENDS, I HAVE THEM BECAUSE THEY ARE GOOD TO ME AND SO ON.  I HAVE A BLACK HUSBAND, I DIDN'T PICK HIM OUT OF A LINE UP OF 100 MEN TO JUST BE DIFFERENT AND SHOCK PEOPLE, I GOT THE TOTAL PACKAGE.  THE N WORD HAS BEEN USED, THE TERM N LOVER HAS BEEN USED AND NO ONE SEEMS TO WANT TO STOP IT.

WHAT IF SOME OF YOU HAD CHILDREN AND THEY GREW UP KNOWING THEY WERE GAY OR FELT DIFFERENT, WOULD YOU DISOWN THEM OR LOVE THEM BECAUSE THEY ARE YOUR CHILD?  I'VE SEEN A PERSON DIE OF AIDS, AND IT WASN'T FROM BEING GAY, IT WASN'T FROM SHOOTING UP OR SHARING NEEDLES, IT WAS ABOUT HER BEING INNOCENT AND MINDING HER OWN BUSINESS AND TWO MEN ATTACKED HER AND THEY BOTH HAD AIDS AND THOUGHT IT WOULD BE FUN DRUNK TO ATTACK SOMEONE.  SHE LOST HER HUSBAND, HER JOB, HER FRIENDS, AND WAS MADE TO FEEL LIKE SHE WAS A PEICE OF DIRT AND LESS THEN.

I'VE SEEN A LOT OF PEOPLE HURT THIS PAST WEEK OVER THIS STUFF AND IT SHOULD STOP.  I ALSO KNOW I CAN'T CONVINCE PEOPLE WHO TO TALK OR TREAT OTHERS, IT CANNOT BE MY JOB. THERE ARE ALWAYS GOING TO BE SOMEONE STUCK ON STUPID AND SOME WHO DON'T CARE WHO THEY HURT.

IM SORRY TO RANT AND VENT BUT THIS STUFF BUGS ME, AND ITS A PRETTY FAST WAY TO MAKE SOMEONE FEEL ON THE OUTSIDE AND LESS THEN.

WITH ALL DUE RESPECT TO MANAGEMENT AND ALL THE GOOD PEOPLE.

I JUST HAD TO HAVE MY SAY

SHELLEY

Posted on: Tue, Feb 5 2008 7:40 PM

Posted by: Debbie Posts: 3,865

i totally agree, it should NOT be tolerated. shelly you don't have to be sorry for what you said.admin, kick their ass out if they are saying these things. no warnings nothing, hit the delete button and out they go, no messing around. this is your site that you developed you have control for this idiotic behavior.

Posted on: Wed, Feb 6 2008 12:41 AM

Posted by: Wheelin Rev Posts: 837

To all,

I have been "quiet" through all of this (gay bashing, Bible thumping and other unacceptable things going on here at Disaboom) and have been at a loss as exactly what to do myself. Like some of the others you have seen "casually" mention this, I too am one of the moderators. I can tell you that I am in contact with the Disaboom staff in Colorado and everyone is still  working on procedures.

Please don't think "bad" of the Disaboom staff. While they have been silent for the most part since they are not "visible" all of the time, there is a LOT going on in the background that the general community never sees. There is also a LOT of moderating going on; it's just not real obvious because of the more isolated but very visible events that occur in the more volatile environment that you will find in real-time chat rooms. Between new members signing up with inappropriate profile contents, unacceptable private messaging and blogs that get reported, and a host of other things that need to be moderated, I assure you that the Disaboom staff clearly hears your concerns. I can also assure you that your concerns will be addressed and in the future, swifter moderation will become more and more obvious.

While the task of moderating may sound fairly easy; "just hit the delete and ban buttons" in reality, it does not work that way.

Please keep in mind that this site is still very much in its infancy age-wise and things are still being smoothed out from the release of "Disaboom 2.0." Moderation of the site also has its glitches that need to be addressed. And ultimately, I hate to say this but Colorado is running out of decaffeinated drinks to keep the Disaboom staff going 24/7. LOL

So please, bear with all of us. In the interim, just make sure that inappropriate communications are reported. I think that I have only been in the chat rooms once and I am not even sure how inappropriate communications are noted other than copying the text with timestamps and sending the information to Disaboom customer service. For chat rooms, I don't know of any "moderator actions" that any of the volunteer moderators could take. You do have the "ignore" function but I hear that only has limited functionality.

For everything else, I can tell you that in my case I have no tolerance for gay bashings just as much as I have against proselytizing (to convert or attempt to convert a person from one religious belief, doctrine, cause, or faith to another) and other clearly non-related to disability type communications. I personally have taken action in both of those situations but like most, they are done discretely behind-the-scenes most of the time. Having moderated websites since 1999, I can also assure you that as soon as one violator of the terms and conditions (Ts&Cs) is taken care of, there is another equally divisive individual certainly to follow. It is like spam; you just can't seem to eliminate it no matter how hard you try.

Sooooooo... If you'll give all of us a chance and some time to work things out, I promise you a much better Disaboom as time goes on. In the meantime, please keep up the reporting of inappropriate content and communications. And thank you, for helping to make Disaboom a place where many will feel comfortable and will want to call their "virtual" home community.

Dave

Posted on: Wed, Feb 6 2008 7:50 AM

Posted by: shellGVchick Posts: 1,261

I AM NOT UPSET WITH DISABOOM STAFF AT ALL.  WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT IT, A LITTLE THING LIKE YOUR SIGNATURE IS SUCH SMALL ISSUE. HECK PART OF ME LIKES BEING A LITTLE LOST ON NEW STUFF LIKE THIS, FINDING THE ANSWERS ON MY OWN KIND OF GET A THRILL OUT OF ME LOL.   IT'S NOT DISABOOMS FAULT THERE ARE PEOPLE ARE WHO BASHING, WE CAN'T HOLD THEM RESPONSIBLE FOR A FEW BAD APPLES.   WE'VE CERTAINLY VOICED OUR THOUGHTS REGARDING THIS ISSUE AND PUT IT OUT THERE ON THE BOARDS.  YOU KNOW THEY ARE READING THEM AT SOME POINT, SO IT IS BEING HEARD.

Posted on: Wed, Feb 6 2008 7:52 AM

Posted by: shellGVchick Posts: 1,261

I JUST GOT TO THINKING WHAT HAPPENED IF THE WORLD JUST SUDDENLY RAN OUT OF COFFEE !!!

GIGGLING I'M NOT A COFFEE DRINKER. 

Posted on: Wed, Feb 6 2008 1:42 PM

Posted by: Lieslmcq Posts: 2,303

I'm a big fan of the ignore feature. The problem I have with heavy moderation is that one person's idea of abuse is another person's idea of a strong opinion. I don't agree in any way with the statements made about homosexuality or members of disaboom who are gay, but I have a hard time condoning the moderation of it. Just my opinion.