In the months leading up to our recent wedding, my then fiancée, Sarah, often joked with me by saying, “A groom doesn’t know how insignificant he is until he attends his own wedding.”

I heard what she was saying but didn’t really understand what she meant. You see, as a wheelchair user, I am accustomed to being the center of attention whenever I am in public. I know that it is nothing personal and fully understand how wheelchairs typically capture the attention – and awkward fascination – of society.

So on a clear and cold day in early January, as the afternoon sunlight filled the University of Virginia chapel, I rolled onto the altar with my best man at my side. We took our positions next to the priest. All eyes were on us and I felt comfortable in the spotlight.

As the string trio began playing Johann Pachelbel’s Cannon in D Major and the invited guests rose to face the back of the chapel, I shifted in my seat. Two heavy wooden doors swung open and my bride appeared on the arm of her father. A collective sigh filled the air and flash bulbs popped.

The spotlight shifted to Sarah and I became insignificant.

She was right! 

And she deserved the attention. The image of my bride walking down the aisle is something I will always remember. In her smile I saw her incredible beauty and in her glow I felt our love. When she arrived at the bottom step of the altar, there was not a dry eye in the chapel.

The ceremony was magical. As we exchanged vows, we felt solidarity and shared a sense of purpose. It was as if we were the only people present in a place neither of us had been before.

The rest of our wedding day passed in a blur. From toasts and cake cutting to dinner and dancing, we enjoyed every moment and cherished every hour. We smiled, laughed, cried and fell more deeply in love alongside over a hundred family members and close friends.

All the months of planning culminated in a day that exceeded our hopes and expectations. Everything about the day was magical. The nervousness and anxiety we felt about chapel construction issues, the necessity of having to use an alternative entrance and the logistical complexities of accommodating a groom in a wheelchair did not matter at all. We simply adjusted our plans, made the most of our situation and enjoyed the experience.

We left the reception to a late night sendoff of bubbles and well wishes. As we climbed into the limousine, we were relieved, tired, and sad the day was over but happy to be alone together for the first time as husband and wife. The ride from the reception to our hotel was only about three miles but we asked our driver to take his time and explore the countryside. We needed time to breathe. The day had gone exactly as we had dreamed and we could not have asked for more.

The spotlight was now ours and it was a spotlight shared of love.