About Me

Hello My name Is Valerie I am a 48 year old black lady who thought i was having a good life, then everything changed1 1/2 years ago i had a massive stroke and was on the floor for 12 to 16 hours before my sister found me there, I had was no warrning it just happen. I was in the hospital for 5 weeks, then in rehab for a few more weeks I spent my birthday in the hospial. then I talked my mother into letting me go to my own home alome, i was at home alone for 9 months before i got in trouble because my family felt that i was not taking good care of myself. then i was moved out of my place by my sisters and their husbands to one of their homes. i have been here 6 months, and i am now ready to live alone again. i think. because i want my own place. i have gotten better, but i have also gained some weight. now i can say that i am not as depressed as i was before. thats a good thing. but my life has changed. i now am retired from the County of San Diego. and i am still young. i am looking for friends to go and do things with. I was a very outgoing person before now i am just a person who is tring to make the best out of her lemons, i guess what they say is true looks are only part. i used to be an attricate person now i feel ugly. but the few friends that i have not pushed away say i look better because i am not too skinny, but i dont feel that way. i want to look like myself again. i am tired of staying home, with little to do. i am not in the wheelchair anymore but i do use a cane. I have never wrote on a blog before, and i am new to this whole things. None of my family or friends understand how i feel and I feel don't try because they are all glad i am alive but i am not. it would have been better for me if i had died on the floor but it was not my time so i try to stay upbeat and not complain. i just try to roll with the punches of life. i try not to feel sorry for mysself. After reading the first draft over i felt i needed to make some changes. Come on people I would like to hear from other stroke victims.. Thank You