It’s the type of sex everyone can have, regardless of their disability. Professionals, from a variety of fields, assisting people with disabilities are recommending Tantric sex as a way to deal with physical restrictions and pain during lovemaking. With one translation of Tantra being “tools for expansion,” this body of knowledge has a lot to offer. This approach to celebrating your union moves you beyond all limitations and boundaries as you get in touch with your essence.
In practicing Tantric sex, you’re focusing on and working with your sacred force – your internal energy. Guided by a set of ancient teachings and practices intended to help you feel more in every way, lovers seek to:
• cultivate awareness,
• explore their sexual energy
• dissolve the sense of self as contrasted with others and the rest of the world
They do this by tuning inward and evaluating their state of mind, breath, and spirit. They practice acceptance and nonattachment to the world around them in releasing themselves to the universe. At the same time, they’re building each other’s energy.
In what becomes a dance of the physical and energy bodies, the sexual experience is slowed, sensualized, and expanded, with lovers staying present in the moment as they work towards deep relaxation. As they become more apt at creating energy within and around, lovers bring themselves closer to a universal energy (for some, this may be a higher power).
It’s important to highlight that the “goal” of sex is not about reaching orgasm. The intention is to experience the breadth and depth of sexuality in pleasuring your partner. Sexual intimacy is a means to mental stillness that can invite bliss and euphoria. This greater awareness can lead to enlightenment.
Amongst the many benefits of Tantric sex are that it...
• Cultivates better communication and more empathic sexuality.
• Involves relishing slow arousal for richer, more meaningful sex.
• Is a means to realizing one’s sexual potential.
• Offers lovers the tools to become more focused in stimulating the erogenous zones, e.g., gazing deeply into each other’s eyes.
• Invites prolonged sexual pleasure.
Tantric sex enables lovers to bond at every level. They are physically close while becoming mentally fulfilled and spiritually satiated. Lovers also get to learn more about each other as they tune into the other’s breath and body. This may include learning more about which actions meant to create pleasure end up causing pain, e.g., what it means when a muscle twitches.
Perhaps one of the greatest gifts of Tantric sex is that it challenges self-defeating thoughts lovers have about disabilities. When it comes to your sex life, the disability isn’t the real problem rather it’s the mistaken idea that there’s only one “right” way to have sex and enjoy it.
Tantric sex is another way to experience sexual pleasure while bringing new meaning to a love relationship. It is the perfect opportunity for lovers to expand their ideas on what it means to be sexually intimate and satisfied. Unlike the medical model of sexual response, this form of sexual expression involves relaxing and letting go in transforming from the physical into the meditative, which invites release from earthly constrictions.
Lovers become liberated in transforming energy. The orgasm tends to take the form of a timeless, deeply relaxing transcendent state. Lovers become one with each other and the universe as their egos as shed. They become a part of the natural state of the cosmos, where no person is defined by their body or society.
See Related Articles
See Disability and Orgasm: Your Orgasmic Potential for more information about sex and disability.
Learn how to talk to your doctor about your sexual health, in Be an Advocate for Your Sexual Health.
